If you've had aggression problems since you were 10 and still haven't learned to deal with your emotions completely
then I feel it can be difficult as an admin because it's been 8 years since you started having aggression problems and you still haven't learned how to balance them.
you say "I can't be helped by psychotherapists" from that sense I get the feeling that if not even someone with an education to help you can't help you
then it feels like you can easily get angry at other players and punish them with a higher penalty than they should have.
Then, unfortunately, I think admin is no.
(But you can prove that I'm wrong)
I'm still glad you found someone to love, I hope you learn a way to balance your feelings.
I have gone through the same thing myself, I have ADHD but I've stopped my medicine and I'm a photographer and work in a restaurant so I work with people all the time.
So I know you can get over your aggression problems.